ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 9:15 pm

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy


OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime


SHOPPING MATHS
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.


GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.


HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a
little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to
understand her at all.


LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot
more willing to die.


PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.


HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and
cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing
the same thing to them at funerals.


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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 6:55 am

Nice jokes...The shopping one is funny.

Here's my own:

> Subject: FW: HOW SMART R U IN MATH??
>
>
> This equation should be taught in all math classes!
>
> From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:
>
> What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever
> wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We
> have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over
> 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?
>
> Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these
> questions:
>
> If:
> A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
> 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
>
> Then:
>
> H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
> 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
>
>
>
> and
> K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
> 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
>
> But,
>
> A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
> 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
>
> And,
>
> B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
> 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
>
> AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.
>
> A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
> 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
>
> So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work
> and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there,
> it's the BullshiT and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.
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"at end of every tunnel there's a light...just hope it not a train"

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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 5:34 pm

Yeah right!!
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Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2007 1:20 pm



What do you mean??

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Posted: Sat Dec 29, 2007 8:10 pm

THAT HE IS A NOOB AND CAN'T UNDERSTAND A THINK!
_________________
Make the others to stand at your will or rot in loneliness staring cold and still.

Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
Final Fantasy 7

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Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 11:19 pm

Noob?? me??
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Posted: Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:51 pm

heres one?
what starts with PO and ends with RN


































POP CORN YOU ****ING PERVERTS!!
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 1:50 pm

"..."mv20vm and dakilang putok are the good jokers here in ds! hehehe! ganda ng mga jokes mo! make more! hey war wrecker! nice joke! ahahaha! *rolls on the floor laughing*
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Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2008 7:27 pm

Tnx bro!! Im gonna post more cool and laughable jokes
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 1:57 pm

"..." yes nakakatawa naman tlga eh... si yukino na ang ngsabi! you 2 are the best jokers here in ds! hehehe! only you 2 have the great jokes! make more pls.! and thx 4 making more!
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 7:17 pm

Huh?? I haven't seen Yukino commented on my posted jokes. Well, thanks again and you appreciated my joke collections. I just posted 2 funny jokes. I'll post more as we go along..
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 8:16 am

i like the first part.
dumb man+ dumb women=pregnancy

wow so true.
_________________
"Knowledge is Power."
"지식은 힘이다."

lol, i'm back after a 6 month break from DotA ^_^

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Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 7:58 am

i love the funeral.duh,tell that to me father,
YOURE NEXT POP!!
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Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 2:19 am

WHAT STARTS WITH FU AND ENDS IN CK?


































FIRETRUCK GET UR MIND OUTTA DA GUTTERS!!!!
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Posted: Fri Mar 07, 2008 5:07 pm

Lol man your jokes are awsome man.Post more please.Kudos and see ya later.
_________________

Don't resist the BITE from a wolf.

Can't you hear him bark at the moon?

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